Do You Use Stress or Does Stress Use You?
By Amanda Da Silva, B.Hkin, B.Ed, and M.Ed
5-minute read
I was shopping the other day when I saw a quote in the changing room of a Lululemon store that read “stress contributes to 99% of all illnesses”.
This really resonated with me as I started to reflect on our perception of stress and what it means to be in control. Because our internal beliefs have such a big impact on how we deal with adversity, our self-efficacy and our ability to manage negative feelings and emotions directly stem from that.
Stress actually has real health implications that span far beyond the momentary distress we experience.
Research shows that the impression we have of how stressed we are does contribute to the state of our health. In some cases, it can even increase the risk of premature death. But the good news is, we have the power to control this. By changing our perception of stressful events and by viewing these encounters as learning experiences or exciting challenges, we can overcome the detrimental effects of stress.
While this is true to a certain extent, we’re all affected differently by the same series of events. So stress does not arise as an effect to a cause but rather as a result of a plethora of interacting elements.
Namely, how our perception of it shapes our interaction with the stressor.
So, if we have a tendency to focus on the negatives, then we might deem a particular event to be a serious threat. On the other hand, another person who has a more flexible viewpoint and whose thinking is rooted in optimism and resilience might find the same event non-threatening. Accordingly, your perception of stress is influenced by many factors, including:
Your beliefs
Your mindset (growth vs. fixed)
Your patterns of thought (optimistic or pessimistic)
Your level of emotional resilience
How to Change Your Perception of Stress
Avoiding stressful situations will only take you so far.
Eventually, you will be forced to face difficulties in one way or another. While you can’t entirely do away with stress, you can develop healthier ways to cope with it so it doesn’t paralyze you.
No.1: Change the meaning you attribute to stress
Our fear of failure often clouds our judgment as we start to overestimate the power stress has over us while we underestimate our ability to cope with it. When we believe that we won’t be able to efficiently manage the situation at hand, we undermine our capabilities and the level of control we have.
Think about a past event when you’ve risen above a challenge, or think about others who have been able to do the same. It’s important to remember that stress is only as powerful as you allow it to be.
No.2: Learn to manage doubt and uncertainty
Not everything that happens to us is within our control.
For instance, you don’t have the power to control other people’s thoughts and actions. You also have no effect over natural events. This realization can lead to feeling insecure and dreading the uncertainty of life.
As a result, you feel unfulfilled when external circumstances prevent you from achieving a given outcome.
No.3: Develop your personal resources
As we’ve established before, prolonged stress can take a toll on your mental, physical, and emotional health.
This is why you need to reclaim your power and equip yourself with internal and external resources to help you manage stress in a healthier and more effective way.
This means sleep, diet, and exercise but also having a supportive network of friends.
Engaging in work that excites you and pushes you to persevere is also an important aspect of stress management because it’s what fuels your emotional resilience and what makes your days meaningful and fulfilling.
By stepping outside of your perception of stress, reassessing the situation, and allowing yourself the time to adjust to changing circumstances, you can make way for a new understanding of stress. Remember that you are in control of your own well-being and happiness.
By reclaiming your right to a stress-free existence, you can reduce the impact stress has on your life and optimize how you respond to it.
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Hi! I’m Amanda Da Silva.
I’m a mother of two boys, a wife, daughter, teacher, entrepreneur, former CEO, and life-long learner. I’m all about personal growth, community 💕, and being of service. (Find out more about me here.) In addition to being passionate about personal development, I’m an educator and coach with 20-years experience teaching and leading in the BC school system. I have a B.Hkin, B.Ed, and M.Ed, specializing in leadership and administration. Creating community and leading thriving teams are two of my favourite things to do. I also love helping people live empowered and growth-oriented lives.
I hope you’ll join me as we build our success together! 🙌