6 Tips for Building Stronger and Healthier Relationships
By Amanda Da Silva, B.Hkin, B.Ed, and M.Ed
5-minute read
Although every person is unique and gifted in their own way, very few people actually work or live in total isolation.
This is why your social skills and empathy, especially when it comes to developing relationships with others, are detrimental to your personal and professional success. With that said, nobody is born with a natural ability to cultivate and maintain great relationships with others.
This is a skill that is learned and perfected with time and (a lot of) practice.
Now you may feel helpless about building new relationships or improving existing ones because you believe that the quality of those relationships lies outside of your control or that it largely depends on the other person. It can be frustrating when there is a lack of communication on their part. The same goes for when your needs aren’t met, or your boundaries are violated.
However, waiting for the other person to make the changes you want is not only disheartening but it’s disempowering as well.
This belief deprives you of the opportunity to actively build meaningful and rewarding relationships, it also leads to a cycle of bitterness and resentment. When these issues persist over time, the festering exasperation, disappointment, and frustration can cause your relationships to deteriorate and dissolve. The good news is you can get better at relationship building. You do have the power and control to establish and maintain strong bonds with the people you value.
6 Tips for Building Healthier and Stronger Relationships ⤵
Better relationships, better life
As human beings, we have an inherent urge or desire to connect with other people.
The relationships we form are vital to our emotional and mental well-being.
Social support is a fundamental part of what it means to be human. When our relationships disintegrate and fail, so does our mental health. Having a network of support that stems from different types of relationships (romance, friendship, etc.) plays an important role in the quality of your life.
Positive relationships are based on support, encouragement, and healthy communication. People in healthy relationships are able to listen to and communicate with one another without any judgment.
They not only trust and respect the other person but they go out of their way to make time for them.
Learning to cultivate healthier relationships can alleviate stress even when the other person is not physically present because you know that they love and support you. Moreover, developing and nurturing strong connections can help you foster healthier behaviors. Holding yourself accountable and staying on track is a lot easier when you’re surrounded by people who also make a habit of doing the same. There is also a mutual sense of purpose that you share with others when you’re in a great relationship, no matter what kind.
How to cultivate better relationships
No.1: Get clear on your relationship needs
How nurturing and rewarding the relationships you build are, largely depends on what you need from others and what you believe others need from you. Figuring out your strengths (as well as weaknesses), what you have to offer, and what you are looking for can be vital in cultivating healthy relationships.
No.2: Develop your communication skills
Clear and effective communication is an important aspect of building better relationships. This is what will help you convey your own experience along with your needs and desires to others. Good communication not only allows you to fulfill your needs, but it helps you feel connected and supported in your relationships.
No.3: Improve your emotional intelligence
Emotional intelligence facilitates your interactions with the people around you. It equips you with essential social tools like empathy, motivation, resilience, and stress management -all great assets to have when collaborating with others or managing conflict. Being emotionally intelligent allows you to sense the changes, no matter how big or small, occurring in yourself and others. This sensitivity helps you build stronger relationships because it shows the individuals in your life that you’re attentive to and completely invested in them.
No.4: Focus on mindful listening
We tend to develop a liking for people who seem to be truly listening to what we have to say, who make us feel important either by remembering specific things about us or by asking the right questions. Mindful listening isn’t just about hearing what the other person is saying, it’s about being completely immersed in the present moment without getting distracted by your own thoughts or judgment. It’s taking in the whole message (body language, facial expressions, words, etc.) so that the speaker feels heard, seen, appreciated, and understood.
No.5: Set healthy boundaries
Never saying ‘no’ eventually leads to feelings of loss, frustration, and unfulfillment.
Without proper boundaries, we tend to confuse our needs and desires with those of people around us. This confusion results in codependency and one-sided relationships. Hence why, it is impossible to enjoy meaningful friendships or romance in healthy relationships without clear personal boundaries.
No.6: Be kind and appreciative
Although we tend to think of ourselves as open-minded and non-judgmental, sometimes, we don’t give other people the chance they deserve, whether it be out of fear or self-preservation. Making a hasty conclusion about someone isn’t fair to that person, but it’s also not fair to yourself. If you adopt a more receptive, compassionate, and appreciative mindset, you may be surprised at the qualities other people have. No matter how different they are from you, there’s always something to learn, and there’s always an opportunity for growth.
In Conclusion
Each one of us has a unique set of needs and desires when it comes to building meaningful and fulfilling relationships.
You may not describe yourself as a social butterfly (or want to be one) and that’s completely okay. With that said, making an effort to form a few connections can greatly improve your mental and emotional health. Having at least one person that you respect, value, and trust to guide you through any issues you’re encountering is definitely worthwhile.
You may find it difficult at first but learning to open up and be vulnerable can be incredibly freeing, not to mention empowering. You absolutely deserve to feel loved, respected, cherished, and cared for. And you deserve to have healthy relationships with compassionate and appreciative individuals that show up for you.
All of this to say, it starts with YOU and your ability to listen, communicate, empathize, understand, and set boundaries.
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Hi! I’m Amanda Da Silva.
I’m a mother of two boys, a wife, daughter, teacher, entrepreneur, former CEO, and life-long learner. I’m all about personal growth, community 💕, and being of service. (Find out more about me here.) In addition to being passionate about personal development, I’m an educator and coach with 20-years experience teaching and leading in the BC school system. I have a B.Hkin, B.Ed, and M.Ed, specializing in leadership and administration. Creating community and leading thriving teams are two of my favourite things to do. I also love helping people live empowered and growth-oriented lives.
I hope you’ll join me as we build our success together! 🙌
